Finding a Therapist: What to Look For
In therapy, one of the strongest predictors of meaningful, lasting progress is the quality of the therapeutic relationship—the connection between a client and a therapist. Yet choosing the right therapist can feel confusing, especially when terms like “Cognitive Behavioral Therapy” or “EMDR” are unfamiliar.
If you’ve ever found yourself searching online for a therapist who aligns with your needs, you likely know how overwhelming the process can be. Websites like Psychology Today help narrow the search, but with countless profiles to skim through, the list of “maybes” can grow quickly. You may end up with several clinicians who seem like a good fit, treat your concerns, and present well. So how do you choose?
Although the process can feel daunting, knowing what to look for can help you make a more confident, informed decision.
Below are key things to consider when selecting a therapist who will be the right fit for you.
Look for Someone Who Specializes in What You’re Struggling With
Therapists often have different areas of expertise. While, we all learn the same information in grad school, many of us will choose a “specialty” after.
If you’re navigating childhood trauma and relational stress, finding someone who works with trauma—especially those that work with nervous system regulation—can greatly improve your outcomes.
Check Their Credentials and Experience
A therapist’s specialty doesn’t automatically mean they’ve pursued advanced training in that area. Choosing a therapist who has credentials that back their specialty matters, as credible experience working with issues similar to yours ensures their competency and that they have the tools and understanding to support you effectively — especially if you're seeking support around a specific area, like trauma, OCD, ADHD, etc.
Look for licensed clinicians who have certifications in their specialties, and if you’re ever unsure, just ask!
Pay Attention to Their Therapeutic Approach
Choosing someone whose approach aligns with your needs and goals can make therapy more personalized, effective, and meaningful. Every therapist has a unique blend of methods they rely on and most will list these on their Psychology Today profile. If you’re ever unsure or have questions regarding what a specific modality means, this can always be discussed during the consultation call or before starting sessions.
Some approaches you might see include:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for patterns of thoughts and behaviors
Attachment-based therapy for understanding relational or childhood wounds
Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT) a short-term, goal-oriented method that focuses on building solutions rather than analyzing problems or past experiences.
Nervous system–focused approaches that work with dysregulation in our every day life, caused by trauma, anxiety/depression, or stressful relational patterns
Narrative Therapy for helping you understand and reshape your story
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) a treatment method that uses bilateral stimulation (like eye movements or tapping) to help the brain reprocess traumatic memories
Find Someone You Feel Emotionally Safe With
You should feel comfortable, respected, and understood by your therapist. In many cases, how you feel when reading their bio, or your gut reaction during the first session (or consultation call), is a helpful indicator. Ask yourself:
Do I feel heard?
Do I feel judged or pressured?
Do I feel like this person understands the heart of what I’m going through?
Emotional safety is the foundation of the therapeutic relationship and good therapy. Without it, progress can be limited.
Consider the Practical Details
When the logistics align with your life, therapy feels more sustainable and worthwhile. A solid practical fit can help remove barriers and increase your commitment. Some things to consider:
Location: Is their office convenient? Do they offer virtual sessions?
Scheduling: Do their hours align with your availability?
Cost and Insurance: Do they accept your insurance, offer out-of-network support, or provide superbills for reimbursement?
Pay Attention to Their Personality & Communication Style
Therapists vary widely in how they show up. Some are more educational or skills-based; others focus on emotion, body cues, past patterns, or solution-focused strategies. There’s no single “right” way—what matters is what feels supportive to you. Notice which style resonates with how you naturally learn, process, and feel supported. Therapy is not one-size-fits-all, and your comfort matters.
Ultimately, trust how your instincts and how you feel.
If you’re not feeling completely sure or something feels off, it’s okay to keep exploring. You deserve a therapist who feels like a partner in your healing—someone who honors your story, understands your patterns, and helps you create meaningful, lasting change. It’s perfectly okay to take your time, ask questions, and prioritize your needs during this process. Finding the right fit is one of the most important steps toward healing.
Are you interested in starting therapy or learning more?
If something in this post resonates with you and you’re interested in starting therapy, I’m here to help. At my practice, I work with adults seeking support with trauma, anxiety, depression, perfectionism, or relational stress. I provide in-person and virtual therapy in Chesterfield, MO, Washington, MO, and surrounding areas, including Franklin County, St. Louis City, St. Louis County, and St. Charles County. You can start by reaching out or scheduling a consultation through my website here.